The Mutual Nature of Conveniences and Inconveniences
by MadameKatekate
Summary: A night elf and a human find themselves fighting together toward a common goal. They cannot fight the other common feelings they find in each other. FemNExMHuman, fun WoW smut time


**[[Author's Note: **

**If you are looking for something plot heavy, you won't find it here. This is purely a vehicle for fun WoW smut.**

**This began as a joke between a friend and I. It practically wrote itself. I hope you enjoy it.]]**

* * *

_**The Mutual Nature of Conveniences and Inconveniences**_

The midday twittering of birds was interrupted by a nameless, gruff rumble. Stopping in her tracks, the night elf closed her eyes and listened carefully. She knew in a moment what invaded her pocket of peaceful forest. _Orc, _she thought, lowering herself to the ground, changing her form. She reopened her eyes as a saber and her senses were notably heightened. Sniffing the air, she cursed silently. _Orcs, plural. How many? Three, five. . .nine._

The scents all muddled together despite the keenness of her nose. She knew for certain that a procession of at least a dozen orcs (and a troll and tauren, she had picked up before her senses were overwhelmed) was headed in her direction and would be less than happy to find her waiting.

_Trespassers_, she spat as she slunk away. At a safer distance, she rose and retook her true form, pulling a dangling piece of moss from her hair. Her only course of action was to leave this place. A single druid against a gang of brutish horde thugs would not live to tell about it. Still...She longed to know their purpose here, so far from their own home and so close to hers. _I could trail them, just until their motive is clear. I could rally the sentinels and trail them,_ she considered, but her thoughts were interrupted by the scrape of metal on metal.

She jumped immediately, grabbing her staff, and twisted around gracefully. A bowed head lifted to reveal an unimpressed face.

"I've been following them for days. As best I can tell, they're returning from campaign."

The human didn't even look up at her, but kept his gaze forward in the direction of the roving band of horde.

_The forest is crawling with unwelcome visitors today_, the elf thought slowly lowering her hands. "I might have caged you in roots permanently for coming upon me like that, human!" Her eyes cut severely at him.

"Apologies." he replied, sounding uninterested, and finally deigning to turn his gaze on her, "I was certain you'd heard my approach before shifting out of your feline form. I won't make such wild assumptions of your abilities again."

She stared wide-eyed at him, watching a smirk grow on the corners of his mouth. He cut off her retort just as she opened her mouth to make it.

"They found my camp and ransacked my belongings. I've been looking for an in, but have found myself unlucky until meeting you just now." The elf glared back at him, her lips drawn in a tight line. "Help me take my earthly possessions back. You'll get rid of the trespassers in this veritable garden of yours," he gestured around them, "And I shall reward you handsomely."

A laugh sputtered from her mouth. "And what do you have to offer me that I might find handsome?"

In a show of disciplined cunning, he ignored the jab and leaned in close. He was silent for a moment, just long enough to leave room for a questionable thought. "Gold. As much as you could ask for. What else?"

He began to walk away and when she didn't follow him several strides later, he turned back to her.

"Well, come along then, elf. Let's make a start of it."

_That smug...The gall to sound impatient with… _her mind reeled, but she found her feet move toward him anyway.

* * *

In the week that followed, the pair pick off the beastly procession little by little. Each body they felled and searched held none of the stolen items. The duo worked surprisingly well together despite the constant back-and-forth that teetered between playful banter and vicious insult. The ribbing intensified at night when the two made camp in cramped, out-of-sight thickets where there was hardly room to think, let alone breathe and forget the other's presence. And when there was finally nothing left to say, they fell into the thick silence of the pointedly unspoken.

They tried not to listen to the other breathe, tried not to watch the other in the dim light of the moon as they washed the blood of orc off of their weapons and armor at the end of the day, they tried all they could to not acknowledge that it was more than convenience of vengeance or the acquisition of gold and trinkets that drew them so volatilely close together. But all pretense had its limits.

They had finally filtered the group down to just four. Two orcs, one the superior of the unit, and the troll and tauren, who had both been too cunning to be pulled away from the group before. The leader was furious now and hulked with rage through the thick forest. After each attack, they found no traceable clue of the human and night elf. How his subordinates had been tricked so easily, felled so swiftly, he couldn't understand, much less how the attackers slipped out of sight, yet still followed them unseen. The horde had no means of reinforcement and no better cover, so the remaining four quickened their pace and readied their weapons.

Emboldened by adrenaline, the pair pressed on.

"You're a handy little elf to have in battle, I'll give you that. But I will be glad to pay and be rid of you soon." the human taunted, running a whetstone down his blade.

"Little? And yet from all angles, I look down on you." she replied coolly, oiling her leathers, trying her best to not bite at the bait he laid out, but before she could move, he lunged forward and knocked her back. His hands found her wrists easily and he hooked his legs just so around hers, rendering her immobile. Even without his armor, she had little hope of escape, long and lithe though she was. She was caught fast. Her body squirmed beneath his in defiance.

He locked eyes with her and intoned deeply, "Every angle, but this one."

He pushed into her and his stature now seemed hulking. He lingered there and his hair fell forward, lush and windswept and smelling all of man. His breath touched her ear and neck and chest and a rich violet hue came to her cheeks. He pulled away abruptly, just as it seemed he might make another move and inner horror spread through her. She had entertained the thought just then and hadn't recoiled at it. A second wave of shock came over her upon seeing his face above her-a triumphant smirk for having bested such a proud creature, dark eyes burning illicitly playful acknowledging that, yes, he intended to make her blush and, yes, he knew he could make her entertain such thoughts. And moreover, most importantly, he saw it all then as it happened in her face-the blush, the realization, the near-acceptance, and then the horror at herself for letting him see it all.

He reveled in the moment completely and in the next instant, he flashed a wide, bright smile. He pushed off of her, plucked his sword and stone up from the ground and began sharpening again, as if nothing had happened.

_This is going to be a long night_, thought the she-self, after the initial sting of embarrassment faded.

* * *

The next morning they were ready to finally finish their foes. They had been lucky, very lucky, to escape every other time after they attacked, but they knew such luck would not be afforded to them now. The horde wouldn't be lured out anymore, their leader wouldn't risk a single one of them to scout. Though brutish and not known for subtlety, the orcs were not entirely unintelligent. This time they would be waiting patiently for the duo.

Slinking out of the cover where they had made camp, the elf felt tight in the chest. Killing one or two at a time hadn't been such a problem, even three. But the threat of death seemed to radiate that morning. An orc at rest was bad enough, but an orc they had repeatedly stirred and poked would be a disaster...and it had angry friends in its company. That was the first time the human ever seemed anything less than jovial. A somber look clouded his eyes and his brows were furrowed deeply.

"After today, we'll have my things back. I'll pay you and you can finally be rid of me." He stared out at the trees. "Or we'll both be dead, in which case," he took her hand firmly, "I thank you for your valiant comradery."

She met his eyes and without a hint of overly saccharine sentiment or sarcasm grasped his hand back just as firmly. "You honor me. Elune keep us both."

And they set off.

* * *

A guttural groan filled the air. The she-elf landed a bolt of lunar energy directly into the orc's gut, causing him to drop his axe from above his head. The creature rumbled and made to charge at her human partner that it had just noticed was behind him with sword in hand. The next moment the orc was run through with a twisted root and coughing blood. She could hardly believe they had done it at all. Before them were the bodies of the two orcs, leader and underling, the troll with his mouth open limply, tusks dirtied with soil and blood. _But wait!_

She yanked her head around just in time to see the hulking tauren barrelling toward her snorting angrily. He swung his gleaming, great blade over his head and brought it down heavily. Her dodge was too late and the blade cleaved into her thigh. She screamed and fell back to the ground. She stared at the sky above and could hear a yell, though it was distant. There was another hoot of rage and a thud that shook the ground and she turned her head to see the tauren fall dead, groaning and surrounded by his thick, matted, black fur. She felt arms around her and lifted a shaking hand to her leg, attempting to gather what healing energy she could from nature.

"No, no...don't." her partner's voice came, reassuring and distant. And then her vision went black.

* * *

Moist heat greeted her as she opened her eyes. She groaned and sat up very slowly. She saw the human across a fire like she was looking through clearing mist...with her pants on his lap.

She slowly pulled the blanket away from her lap and looked down and was relieved to see her legs covered in her own thin linen pants. She wondered briefly about how they had gotten on her, but she couldn't waste energy on the worry and he kept his gaze respectfully low. Carefully she stood and walked to the fire, her wound singing in complaint.

"It took you a bit longer to come to than I expected." he said, matter-of-factly. "A day and a half."

"Oh. ...Thank you." She shifted. "The tauren...I thought it was dead."

"As did I. I saw him only moments before you. It was a miracle I reached you in time at all. Here," he handed her her newly stitched legguards. "The devil's blade cut straight through it. I'm afraid I don't have the most skill at mending leather, but it should last until we reach town."

The work was amateur, but utilitarian and precise. A smile crept across her lips and she couldn't help the playful comment that came out next.

"Eh," she grunted noncommittally, "It will _do_, at least."

She saw his eyes cut dangerously at her, then his expression softened.

"Thank you." she added. He nodded graciously in return and stood under the pretense of gathering more firewood.

She went in the opposite direction behind a tree and pulled her softer linen pants down to examine her wound. It was mending well on its own, and now she was awake she could see the greenish tint that always covered her scars as they healed, her body's way of imbuing itself with nature. She wrapped the bandage back around it and was suddenly overtaken by the mental image of his hands having wrapped it first. She could suddenly feel him there, warm and firm and steady, and his other hand on the opposite leg, but traveling upward.

Warmth spread throughout her body and she reclined her head. The unnamed sexual frustration she had felt since meeting the human had come back to her in a huge wave and she couldn't stop her own hand from reaching to the delta of her thighs. She slipped a finger in between the lips and was greeted by an eager, hot, slick sex. Just as she forgot herself and began to rub, the sound of footfall broke her from her reverie. Ignoring the pain in her leg, she thrust her pants back on and joined her partner.

It was decided that, though the task was done, they would travel back together to the nearest town. The human made good on his payment from what they had retrieved from the horde thieves and promised what remained upon their return to civilization. The amount awarded her was indeed handsome, enough to cause her embarrassment when she thought on hoq she laughed in his face.

When questioned what item it was precisely they had worked so hard to retrieve, he simply smiled and placed his hand over his pack. "Something of great, irreplaceable sentiment." he'd answer.

Travel was not so difficult and they didn't have to cram themselves into impossible spaces at night with the threat of horde gone. They did stop to rest on her account more than they might have had she not been injured, but he was kind enough to not mention it. He jested still, testing what cracks were safe to her wounded pride, and she returned fire, unable to stop herself. Soon they grew very watchful of each other again, neither saying it aloud, but the admission written plainly on both of their countenances. They had never felt so charged and never dreamed they would be as close as they were to release.

* * *

The day they came to the inn, it was raining. Holding off until the very last moment, the deluge came quickly and threatened to drown anything too slow or too squat. The proprietor, who had a keen eye for this sort of weather and a practiced hand with care of her guests, was prepared and greeted them with hot drinks and dry wraps. The duo sat by the fire resting their feet until the innkeeper finally came down announcing that their room was ready.

The she-elf's eyebrows furrowed deeply. _Room, singular. _Not wanting to be rude they walked up without saying a word, but once the door was shut behind them, a manly roar of laughter filled the air.

"I...I don't even have the heart to correct her!"

They shrugged at each other and decided it could be worse, and beside the point, she pointed out, they'd already been in closer quarters than the single yet spacious room offered. They separated to undress, she still laughing inwardly as she slipped behind the screen covering the tub. Wet as she was from the rain, she quickly washed the sweat and dirt off, leaving as much fresh, warm water as she could for her partner. He'd stepped out for only a moment to give her privacy, so she hurried and pulled a loaned robe that clung to her wet skin on, and opened the door, so he knew it was safe to reenter. She combed her hair out quickly and made to leave as he had, but he called out to her.

"No, stay. Rest. Just no peeking." he smiled.

She gratefully stayed and fell back onto a real bed for the first time in over a week. Minutes later, she opened her eyes, not having meant to doze off, and stood quickly to gather their dirty clothes to deliver downstairs for laundering.

* * *

Bent over, she glanced upward and before she could think to look away, she caught sight of him through a crack in the screen. The light glinted off his toned, nude body; water rolled down his biceps, abdomen, and thighs in slow, lingering rivulets. She felt an involuntary pull in her neck, but ignored it. She couldn't turn away now and, moreover, did not want to. As he ran a fresh cloth down his body, her eyes widened and her mouth fell open into a slack little 'o'. The warmth she felt so many times before returned with intensity and she hardly noticed her robe had fallen open slightly exposing half of her chest and a shoulder.

He turned then, giving her full view of his backside. His broad shoulders bore a deep, but long healed over scar on the left side, muscles cut and dipped just so across the back of his waist. She felt the blood grow in her cheeks as she took in his posterior, never having been so struck by the sight of one before. He rinsed a final time and began toweling himself off and as the sound of the dripping water faded he paused, disturbed by the feeling of eyes on him. Turning he saw her through the crack staring openly at him and felt a lightness in his knees. He fell back half a step and gripped the linen in his hands that limply covered him halfway across the chest and just barely over his groin. Regaining his footing and not breaking eye contact, he stepped from behind the screen.

Her breath hitched then though she had been frozen from the second she saw his back tense and he realized he was being watched. She was now aware of her partially opened robe, the air on her skin, and her still damp hair unbraided and clinging gently to her shoulders and back. As he stepped out of the shadow of the screen, he stopped and they took each other in. He looked so different yet so the same with his own hair let down and wet. It hung in sheets straight down his back, the walnut brown hue darkened from the water. Neither of them bore the look of biting wit that they had since they met, but rather, finally, unmasked desire and want.

He dropped the linen then and she was able to take him in fully, all muscles, and thick, faintly tawny skin, and manhood. Before her eyes had traveled back up, he was walking to her. One arm wrapped deftly quick around her waist and the other pulled the loosely tied sash from her robe away. He knelt his head to the hollow just under her shoulder for a moment before backing away and letting the robe fall to the floor in a soft puddle at her feet. There she was before him, the way he wanted her all along, though he denied it to even himself. Her hair, dark and blue, like velvet in the sun, and skin, fair with the slightest hint of periwinkle, shone in the filtered sunlight. When he was younger, he thought such hues were unnatural and in an instant he reached back in time and slapped his naive younger self. He watched her breasts rise and fall as she sighed and felt his manhood stir.

Together then they met each other and kissed tentatively and again with more certainty and in the next moment they were on each other wolfishly. He pushed her against the wall brusquely and his mouth left her lips to nip at her earlobe and that soft sensitive spot just below on her neck and lower still down her chest to her breasts. A hand wrapped around each, squeezing firmly but teasing her nipples gently, before lowering his mouth to one and tracing his tongue over her areola, closing his mouth over it. He alternated sucking and biting gently, but sometimes harder, any way that made her jump under him and moan softly. By the time he had moved to the opposite breast, her sex was aching in want for him. She pushed against him begging silently for his tongue and hands to be all over her all at once. As an answer he looked back up to her suddenly, breathing heavily, and wrapped one arm around her waist and his other free hand hovering just over her delta. He hesitated and leaned closer to her, opening his mouth to ask permission, but was cut off.

She looked back at him and said low in his ear, practically begging, "Please."

He met her mouth in a slow kiss as his hand covered her and slowly opened the lips. She was so wet already and hot just for him and his hard cock twitched against her at the thought. His fingers teased her, running up and down the slit, pushing against her clit with a careful firmness, encircling it with his thumb and forefinger and tugging softly. Moaning into his mouth, her knees went weak and she fell against him. A sturdy arm was there to steady her and as she regained position, he changed his, dropping slowly to his knees in front of her.

His hands gripped her hips and he left a trail of kisses from her belly button to the top of her pubic mound before lifting one of her legs and slipping it over his shoulder. He bowed his head to her and was briefly reminded of his prayers. Finding it strangely fitting, he smiled as his tongue met her.

Much like their banter, he knew instinctively the hows and whens of working her up to fevered heights. His fingers held her close to him no matter how she squirmed against him and he ran his tongue over every bit of her womanhood, sometimes deeply generous, other times a deliciously awful tease that made her jump under him and tug at his hair which her hands has long been buried in. He lapped up the juices that flowed freely covering his face and her thighs and when he felt she couldn't take it any longer he suctioned around her clit, working it, circling his tongue around faster and faster until she exploded in climax. She called out, high and breathless, for him. Her thighs tensed on either side of his head and her clit pulsed as a deluge of her juices flowed generously onto him, all that he could swallow greedily and more.

When the last of the waves of pleasure had subsided, he finally pulled away and her leg slipped lazily off his shoulder. He stood, his cock still hard and now practically aching, and kissed her again. She pushed against him as she tasted herself on his lips until they reached the bed and he fell against it. She climbed onto his lap and pulled him back up to sitting. Wrapping her hand around his cock, she paused and turned away feeling somewhat shocked with herself. A finger pulled her chin gently back and a grin and reassuring nod greeted her. Laying her forehead against his, she took a breath and positioned herself. She then grinned as well remembering his teasing and felt a surge of devious playfulness.

She lowered herself to him, but stopped short of letting him push through. A huff of frustration left his cheeks involuntarily. Hips winding on his lap, she let him feel her without letting him have her and she felt his resolve wear thin with every hitched breath and firm grasping of her hips. She finally lowered herself and let his manhood push into her, which set both of them to moaning. She stopped one last time before sitting flush against him and leaned into his ear yet again.

"Patience…" she cooed.

His jaw tensed then and he let her slide down slowly until the very end when he grabbed her quite unexpectedly and pulled her down while thrusting up forcefully. She screamed in earnest then and threw her torso back. When she met his gaze again, he was smiling.

"Decorum..." he admonished. He could tolerate some play, but would always have the last word.

She wrapped her legs around his waist and rode him, grinding her hips alternately hard and soft. He matched her pace and made busy with his mouth on her neck and chest and breasts. The feel of him inside and on her was exquisite; every one of her spots was stimulated generously. She felt that climbing feeling again all too soon and she fell to pieces in his arms when she came, her inner walls squeezing him tightly. After regaining herself, she ordered him further back on the bed and had him lie back. She remained on top and leaned back, catching herself with her hands, and continued to ride him. She could feel his eyes on her, gazing at her arched back and breasts rocking back and forth, down her stomach to her pelvis. She knew he would enjoy watching his hard, proud cock working in and out of her wet quim, the sight of her curved ass resting against his thighs.

He grunted out moans as she worked and couldn't stop a hand reaching forward to play with her. He rubbed her clit the way he had quickly learned she like, with his thumb and forefinger in a circular motion with gentle force. He could feel her quiver as she approached ecstasy again and though he tried to pace himself, he knew he wouldn't be able to contain himself much longer. After her orgasm, he sat up and scooped her into his arms, standing and turning her onto the bed in one long, swift movement. He pulled her to the edge of the bed and hooked his arms under her thighs to hold her to him.

His pace was fast and the intensity of his thrusts grew exponentially. All the while he watched her lying there before him, breasts bouncing, hair around her face, softly glowing eyes on nothing but him, sweet lips open and moaning for him, telling him everything through passion-riddled moans and clipped speech. He soon lost himself and his pace turned frenzied. The only objection came when he pulled out of her, taking his cock in his hand and pulled her down to the floor under him.

When she realized what he wanted to do, she was shocked. She thought she might be too proud, but she suddenly felt no need for pride and looked up to him with consent. Her eyes closed for just a second and she was briefly reminded of her prayers. Finding it strangely fitting, she smiled and opened her eyes to him. She offered her body to him, moaning encouragingly. His spilled his seed, groaning loudly, deliciously as he did, onto her.

They lay together afterward and finally found rest after their journey.

* * *

The next day they left the inn, intending to separate and go to their respective homes, but as they made their way to the town's market for supplies, they heard the crier call out news of a nearby village pillaged violently by the horde. Pushing through the crowd they found an appointed messenger of some benefactor funding the expedition for justice.

The human's certain, sharp grin returned.

"You wouldn't feign any special appointments to back out and save face now, would you? I wouldn't judge you if you did…"

The elf scoffed. "Hardly. I was just hoping that your strength was returned by now from yesterday, so I wouldn't have to ask for both wages when I did the work of two."

They stepped forward and settled details with the messenger. As they turned back into the crowd, he leaned to her.

"If you can manage to come out of this one uninjured, I'll gladly show you the work of two."


End file.
